The usefulness of the answers you receive to questions about how you should live your life is determined by the questions you ask. Questions like “How can I become an alpha male?“, “Why don’t they like me?”, or “What would William Shatner do?” will typically take you away from your core values and the life you want to live. There are other, more productive questions, that will take you closer to your One Perfect Day.
I just got an email from a client who’s recently completed his coaching journey who articulated this situation perfectly.
His life has been a rollercoaster of challenges and experiences due to asking the wrong questions. He spent his life focussing on the wishes and desires of others and wondered why his life left him feeling empty and meaninless. After years of struggling to find productive solutions, he turned to coaching to find the core of his issues and a reliable, long-term solution. Though this process, he found his answer – two simple questions.
These two questions have given him the clarity to be able to look at himself in mirror without shame and the strength to start moving forward with his life. If you’re struggling to feel authentic and strong, read these questions in his email below.
Now that I’ve had the time to fully digest how much coaching has changed my life, I wanted to share something with you…….and before you get excited, it’s not my extensive nubian goat porn collection…
For most of my adult life (especially the past 10 years), I felt uncomfortable looking at myself in the mirror. This was not due to any major complex I had concerning my appearance (granted, I’m not exactly Hugh Jackman material…but I scrub up ok)…..but rather I saw a fraud staring back at me every time – a small boy pretending to be a man.
The small boy who kept his desires well hidden, the small boy who needed to gain others’ permission to do the things he wanted, the small boy who convinced himself he was happy in his relationship to counter the fear of being alone. And with each passing year, as the small boy’s physical appearance took on that of the man he was supposed to be, it became increasingly difficult to confront.
So what has changed since going through coaching? Well for starters, I’m no longer uncomfortable looking in the mirror because the man I’ve become is now congruent with the physical appearance of the man I see. Of course, this is a constant work in progress but the small boy has gone….and the fraud has gone with it. Every day is full of excitement and possibility, where once there only existed the resignation of someone who had decided to settle for less.
I never used to speak of power and connection because I didn’t have a concept of what they were, and how they could change my life. I now actively seek out both through challenging my perceptual barriers and reminding myself daily:
What kind of man do you want be?
What would he do right now?
Sure, I stumble along the way but having the presence of mind to come back to these questions gets me back on the right path soon enough.
There have been two major turning points in my life to date, which has changed it dramatically for the better:
1. Going to Japan as an exchange student in 1994, age 15
2. Discovering meditation back in 2003
It is no exaggeration to say that LifeOS represents the third, and probably most significant turning point in my life. I know I’ll look back at this last few months for many years to come and say that’s where it all happened……and for that, I can’t thank you enough.
Hope you’re well and thank you once again for getting me on this pathway towards becoming a better man.
Keep em huge,
If you want to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of the kind of Man you are, then it’s not going to happen by accident. It’s going to take commitment, courage, determination, self-awareness, and focus control.
If you don’t feel like you can do it on your own, then we can help.