How to Have a Threesome: Your Step by Step Guide

The 7 critical stages of a ménage à trois and how to execute them effortlessly
how to have a threesome

The only thing hotter than watching two smoking hot women devour each other in a steamy embrace is having sex with them while they do.

And while you might think that threesomes are simply the result of good luck or even just the stuff of testosterone-hyped locker room talk, I can confidently say that they’re not. They can be the product of a conscious and deliberate plan that ensures everyone has a fun night.

You just need to know how.

So, to make sure those fantasies of your just end up being more than something you Google on a lonely friday night, here are the 7-steps to setting up and enjoying an incredible night with two amazing women.

Step 1. Find the right girl

This might seem obvious, but you must start here. There are some women who’re simply too closed off to jump in the deep end with you and that shy, nerdy looking type you see at the coffee shop every Thursday.

No, she doesn’t have to be a promiscuous party girl, fresh from her first high school sweetheart and looking to explore all the sexual wonders that life in college has to offer. She doesn’t even need to have had a threesome before. All she needs is to be comfortable with her sexuality and willing to try new things.

This will be most women that are confident, cool, and fun. If you try this with a sexually repressed, scared, insecure women, you’re just going to cause yourself more problems than it’s worth. I know it’s hard to believe that dealing with annoying questions and over-inflated dramas can outweigh the feeling of having a girl sitting in your lap and the other on your face, but it will.

You might be able to put up with it for a week, or even a month, but it’ll get to you. Trust me.

Step 2. The magic question

There’s a magic question you can ask any woman that will push your chance of a threesome through the roof. Most guys go with ‘Will you do this for me?’ or ‘If you really loved me…’ and fail miserably. Why? Because they’re missing the point.

The secret to having many, many threesomes isn’t being great at convincing women to do things for you. It’s something far simpler…

Imagine yourself standing at an ATM with a newly found ‘sexy’ friend. She’s looking at you all coy, batting her eyelids, and leaning forward so you can stare straight down her cleavage. After touching your arm and laughing at a few jokes, she asks “Can you give me $300? I’d really like it. If you loved me, you would.”

Would you do it? Would you even consider it? Well, that’s what you’re asking when you mention how sexy her best friend from high school looks in that red skirt.

But what if she said something different? What if she came at this from a different angle?

What if she said “I know how much you’ve been dying for a threesome, but I just don’t feel comfortable doing it with a friend, so I’m going to hire that pornstar you love to join in with us. The only problem is I’m $300 short. Can you cover the rest?” Different story, isn’t it.

Why? Because she’s not asking for something from you, she’s helping you do something. It’s not about her; it’s about you.

This is the secret to having more threesomes than you can count: stop making it about you and make it about her. “But how do I do that????” I hear you scream. Well, it’s easy. It all starts with one innocent question:

“What kind of women do you like?”

Simply. Innocently. Casually. No pressure, no stress, just a simple question.

This is the secret to gently guiding your inexperienced female friends into the debaucherous and dirty world of threesomes. Don’t ask “Do you like women?” More often than not, from fear of judgement, most girls will say “No.”

If you ask “What kind of women do you like?”, it lets her know that you already know she likes women and that it’s ok for her to talk about it. Ask her about the look, the vibe, get her to elaborate on as many details as she feels comfortable. Don’t push her too far. All you want to do is set up a relationship that’s open, free, and she feels comfortable talking about the kind of women she’s attracted to.

Step 3. The build up

Now that you’ve got her comfortable talking about the women she’s attracted to, does this mean you’re going to come home one day and find her spread-eagled, tied to your bed, with that hot friend you’ve always dreamed about in between her legs?

Possibly, but not likely.

Once she’s opened up about the fact that she’s as attracted to Jenny as much as John, it’s time to water that seed and watch her blossoming desire grow. You do that by gradually coaxing more and more sordid and erotic details out of her.

Phase 1. Casual Questioning

As you’re strolling down the shopping arcade, arm in arm, feeling relaxed and loved, just after you’ve finished a big lunch and you’re feeling that post-food satisfaction, and you see a girl who matches the description your girlfriend gave you…

…just casually ask “Is that the kind of girl you like?”

That’s all. There doesn’t need to be any saucy details or intricate descriptions about the positions she’d put her in or the different knots she’d use to tie her up. It just needs to get her more comfortable talking about the kinds of women she likes. Make it as casual and as simple as possible.

Phase 2. Finding Fantasies

Once she’s comfortable talking about the women in her fantasies, it’s time to move onto the next step – exploring her fantasies.

Take her to a club or anywhere that she’s going to get a little drunk and a bit loose. When she’s sweaty from grinding up against her, start pointing out women and find the ones that she likes. Then, start to find out what she really wants to do.“Would you let her go down on you?”

  • “Would you go down on her?”
  • “What kind of kisser do you think she’d be?”
  • “Can you imagine what it would feel like to have her legs wrapped around your head?”
  • “Who do you think has the nicer xxxxxxxx?”

Really start to push the envelope. Just see how far it goes. She’s drunk, she’s horny, she’s sexually adventurous, and she feels safe talking about this kind of stuff with you. It’s game on.

BUT, your aim isn’t to take home a girl tonight. If you think you can, great. But it’s not necessary, there’s still one more build up step.

Phase 3. Getting Dirty

If you’ve followed all the steps until now, then you should have a horny, curious, confident, and adventurous woman on your hands. She’s ready to go, but she’s still not there yet. There’s still one more step to add in before she starts to BEG you to seduce her best friend.

Next time, you’re having sex, start the dirty talk.

I’m not going to go into details about how you do this. There are plenty of books and DVDs out there you can get on this topic. Once you’re comfortable telling her all the dirty things you’re going to do to her and screaming about how tight she feels, then start to introduce the x-factor in.

“Imagine what it would feel like to be stretched apart by my hard xxxx as xxxx’s tongue runs up and down your clit…”

Your job (should you choose to accept it) is to get her imaging what it would feel like to have sex with you while another woman joins in. Get her hot, get her turned on, get her into the mood, and get her cumming while thinking about how much hotter it would be if another girl were there.

If you do this right, she’ll be the one starting the dirty talk.

She’ll be talking about all the dirty things she and her new work colleague from accounting with the short skirt and the killer legs could do to you.

Step 4. 1 + 1 + ? = 3

If she’s not begging for you to bring a girl home now, then you’ve done something wrong. Go back to the start and see where you stuffed up. By this time, you’ll be taking her out, and she’ll be pointing out all the girls she wants you to seduce. Now, the real work starts.

You’ve got one girl, but now you have to work your magic on the number 2.

This is where the real work starts and the part that usually takes the most time. There’s very little chance that you’re just going to see a woman in the street, talk to her for 5 minutes, and then all of a sudden, she’s going to be tearing the belt out of your girlfriend’s pants.

You’re going to need time to work through basically the same process you’ve just gone through with your girlfriend (except obviously without the sex part).

Start out by heading out with your girlfriend. Go somewhere fun, cool, where people are getting loose and fun. Bars and house parties are the best for this kind of action. Find a girl that your girlfriend really likes and get to work. Start out by flirting, playing around, mentioning your girlfriend, but making sure you focus on pushing her buttons.

Really work her over. Get her all fired up. The place you want to get her to is thinking “If you didn’t have a girlfriend, I’d drag you home, right now.”

Once you notice that she’s so wet that she’s leaving slippery puddles lying all over the ground, it’s time to bring your girlfriend into the picture.

  • “My girlfriend thinks you have the hottest arse…”
  • “My girlfriend told me that she thinks you have the sexiest legs she’s ever seen…”
  • “My girlfriend’s never been with a girl before, but if she was going to, she said you’d be the kind of girl she’d want to do it with…”

Once she’s hot, wet, horny, and trying to find some excuse to get you into her panties, it’s time to drop the money question:

“What kind of girls do you like?”

If you’ve done everything right, it won’t matter what kind of girls she usually fantasises about when she’s exploring her panties with her hands, there’ll only be one answer: Your Girlfriend.

By that point in time, she’ll have spent so much time imagining what it would feel like to have your sweaty, hard body, pinning her delicate frame to the mattress/couch/bathroom wall/backseat of your car/any dark corner of the club she can get 5 minutes alone with you that she’ll say anything to make her dreams come true.

Step 5. Escalate

This is about the time you should introduce my girlfriend into the mix and see what needs to happen next. You’ve got your girlfriend begging you to find girls to bring home for her, and you’ve got the kind of girl your girlfriend wants, dripping wet and ready to do whatever you want to get filled by your manliness.

It’s a pretty favourable situation that really requires very little intervention. But if you find that they’re not moving along under their own steam, there is one sentence you can use to push it over the edge:

“There’s nothing hotter than watching two girls dance with each other.”

Flashing lights, thumping music, and two horny, wet, loose girls grinding up and down each other, both trying to turn you on as much as possible.  They’ll be touching, bumping, groping, and fingering as much as the law will allow. All you need to do then is join in, gently guide their lips together, and watch the magic happen.

When they’re finished tasting the delicate pleasures of the fairer sex, it’s time to take them by the hands and lead them out of the club. Throw them both in the back seat of the car, tell them to get to know each other, and get your arse back to your place asap.

Step 6. The Sex

I’m not going to go into detail about what happens here because it’s going to be completely different in every situation. The most important part is that you approach this more as a business manager than a horny 16 year old.

You’ve got two women here. Each one with her own desires, pleasures, and fetishes. Your job is to make sure that each woman walks away from this feeling satisfied.

If you go in there just wanting to get off and fall asleep, it’ll be the last time you ever have a threesome. You need to take control, pay SPECIFIC attention to each girl, and make sure she’s getting EXACTLY what she wants.

  • If she’s the kind of girl that LOVES to be dominated and thrown around, then dominate her, throw her around, and tell the other girl to join in.
  • If she’s the kind of girl who loves to be pinned and tied up then make sure you tie her up and get the other girl to join in.
  • If she’s the kind of girl who loves a bit of slap and tickle then make sure you let her have it and that the other girl joins in.
  • If she’s the kind of girl who loves to be in control, then you need to make the active decision to let go of control and give her the chance to have her way for a while.

But whatever you do, make sure you’re the one making it happen. You’ve created this situation and taken responsibility for bringing these girls together, so it’s on you to make sure they get what they want from it. If you can do this, it could be the start of a very fun relationship. If you don’t, it’s the LAST time it’ll happen.

Step 7. The Followup

Yes, you’ve had your fun. Yes, it was great. But there’s still more to do. If this is the first time your girlfriend has ever had a threesome, then she’s going to be dealing with a lot of emotions the next day. They could range from guilt, to shame, to excitement, to pleasure, to curiosity.

Whatever they are, you need to make sure you’re there for her to support her through what she’s going through. She might be nervous about bringing up the topic so make sure you make time to pull her aside and have a one on one chat with her about the night.

Talk about the things you liked, the things you didn’t enjoy, and encourage her to do the same. Then, talk about what you would do differently next time and see how she’d feel about a next time. Also remember that there were two girls involved and they will both have feelings that need to be addressed. Take some time out to chat with the other girl and make sure she’s ok with the whole situation.

  • She might want to swap phone numbers with you, but she might not.
  • She might want to swap phone numbers with you but your girlfriend might not.

Whatever happens, just roll with it and remember that you’re dealing with people’s feelings here.

How does this tie in with personal development?

The life you want is going to be filled with many wonderous, adventurous and amazing things. I’m not here to judge your sexual pursuits. I’m simply here to help them become a reality in a way that ensures everyone walks away feeling happy, fulfilled and satisfied. And if you follow this guide, I can guarantee that everything outside the sex part will be good. That last part is up to you 🙂

The missing piece

There is one part of this puzzle I haven’t mentioned. Following these steps and pushing forward with your desires requires the ability to say things that can be challenging. They require you to step beyond your edge and outside your comfort zone and that can be tough.

The good news for you is that improving your ability to express your thoughts, feelings, and desires is a skill and like any skill, it’s one you can improve through practice.

If you’d like to improve your chances of having a threesome, a good place to start is with our Tough Conversation Challenge. It’s a simple, straight-forward, and easy way to practice expressing your thoughts, feelings, and desires inside a safe framework that allows you to push your boundaries without freaking out.

If you’re ready to start spending more time with two close friends rather than just one, check out our Tough Conversation Challenge here.

© LifeOS 2006-2019

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