June 12, 2019 at 6:16 am #23063
It is an amazing feeling to be liked by a girl. To see the love in their eyes, to see them being shy around me, to see their face with that tender smile, damn, it kills the fuck out of my brain. Some of them are really soo shy and strangely i like that. I like girls who are closer to the feminine type.
its soo cool . to imagine being around a feminine type of girl. To sense her shyness, that flirty sweet ass smile, those mind fucking sweetness-radiating eyes, that mind numbing low toned voice etc.
But, I amazingly suck at dating .Sometimes, a girl might rather watch a “dog piss on the road” than text me. Lol .
sometimes , i am soo excited when i text a girl ,that, only my keypad will know the pain it had to go through to survive my intense texting sessions. And in the end, the girl would go silent and things are soo silent that one can even hear a mosquito fart. but, yes, i am learning from these situations too.
today , i am here , writing this, to talk about this nagging pain that i have at times.I feel that the world is in a bad state and it kind of bothers me. i know that i can change my life and fill it with wonders ,but, i still doo think that ” the economic system is rigged, and some elites are trying to kill some part of population, etc”,now, the thing is , i start thinking like ,”do i need to bring in another kid into this world”. i really like to live with a girl and have a family, but, i see bad things happen to people and i start wondering if i should really marry or not.
but, sometimes, I ask myself ,”why should i stop enjoying this life fearing the violence created by some humans”. sometimes i feel that its better for a kid to rather experience this life even if it kind of sucks .
i really dont know what i would choose .
as lifeos puts it, i am mostly worrying about things that arent in my hands, which brings me to what i am planning to work on for now.
well, I am going to work on feeling comfortable in my body and i am going to work on staying equanimous. I think these two will help me deal with emotions in general. so, meditation seems like a choice. let me see.June 20, 2019 at 12:49 am #23095
Interesting thoughts. And it’s something I’ve had running through my head for a while. Does the world really need more children? My wife and I have one child who we had before these thoughts started to bubble to the surface, but I would have to give very serious thought to having one now.
Now, to respond to your points.
Firstly, while the media portrays the easy-to-accept image that the world economic system is rigged, that’s just not the case. It’s an easy story to sell to people who want to blame the world for their limited success but it’s just not true. I’m not saying that’s what you’re doing as I have no idea about who you are or how you live your life. It’s just the common theme I’ve seen.
There is SO much money changing hands every single day and that it’s literally impossible to try and lock people out of it. I know plenty of people who came from nothing making more than $10,000/month in so many different areas and even while my income isn’t at that level right now, it was for a number of years without having to grind myself into the ground.
Yes, there are significant barriers to entry in some spaces that make it tough to get a start, but there are fewer and fewer every day online.
Secondly, the thing to remember when having a child is that: it only takes one person to change the world. The Greta Thuberg is only one person. Malala Yousafzai is only one person. Gandhi was only one person. All these single people, at one point, did not exist and were conceived by their parents. They were raised with a set of ideals and thoughts and values and have gone on to change the way the world operates and thinks.
Why couldn’t your future child do the same?
I’m very conscious of this fact when raising my son. I know he will grow up as one of the most privileged kids in the world (not specifically in financial terms, but more in terms of his personal development and support) and will have a massive opportunity to do something incredibly significant if he wants. I see my role as giving him effective foundations so that if he decides to fight the good fight and make a difference, that change will be positive for all.
That’s just my 2c.
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