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Can I be helpful to women when they ask without being unattractive?

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  • #23362

    Vaom
    Participant

    If a girl asks me to do something for her (e.g., if they were to ask me to clean something for them, go and get something for them) I almost always never do it (unless maybe I was already planning on doing it anyway), regardless of how effortless it is, because I have this aversion to being ordered around. Also, if they ask for help with something that they are also taking part in that is going to take up quite a bit of my time (as in, something like 10 minutes to a few hours), I usually don’t do it, even if I like the person, because I don’t want to waste my time like that.

    However, if they ask for help with something that they are also taking part in (e.g., helping them move something) and I like the person, and I know that is going take at most a few minutes and doesn’t require much effort on my part, I don’t mind helping them because it doesn’t take up much of my time. I know the conventional wisdom that you find everywhere online is that you should never help a girl who asks you for help, or help them but then ask for something in return, but sometimes when I do that I feel like a complete asshole. This is true even when I can tell that the girl is just testing me and doesn’t really need my help. With this one person, I get the impression that she doesn’t genuinely need my help but just asks for help with things to see if she can control me.

    However, if I decide not to help them with something that will take a few minutes because I think they will become unattracted to me after I do that, does that mean that I am changing myself to make them like me, right? But on the other hand, aren’t women completely unattracted to guys who do things like this for them? I don’t know what to do.

    #23364

    Vaom
    Participant

    One example is that I could tell that this one girl really liked me, and then she asked me for help with something that she couldn’t do by herself, and because I knew it would only take like 30 seconds I was like OK. And I could tell over the course of the next few days that she started to lose interest in me and she barely talks to me anymore.

    #23376

    Anthony Love
    Participant

    I’ve seen this often at my previous job at the gym.

    Women smiled when I looked at them with the face that said fuck no bitch! I dated one woman at that gym. She said that differentiated  me from the other guys there. I did help her once she become my manager. She even asked why I helped her on that occasion with that with a smile on he face. I really wanted to pull out this info and say read this. Then reply, if I want my dick in your mouth which I do at times I can’t ever help you so don’t ask for anything. This has occurred a lot at gym.

    My thing is this: a woman is carrying  grocery bags and can’t handle them. Will you not help? If your wife asks for help when your moving into the new house will you say no?

    Please delve into why the woman became  less attracted to you? It seems like your leaving details out. What did you help her with that took you 30 seconds? Seems like some B.S.

    If being an alpha is doing what you want, then you weren’t wrong if you really wanted to do it. Maybe she thought wrong of you. why do you care? Did you like her? What else was going on?

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