There are two very separate elements to your body language when talking to women:
The physical and the mental.
The physical side is the part of your body language that you’ve just trained into yourself over the years.
This can include slumped shoulders, head down, poor eye contact.
The Internet is filled with advice on this kind of stuff, so I’m not going to waste your time with that.
It could go on for hours about how to “Stand as if you could feel a piece of string, attached just at the top of your spine, pulling you towards the sky”…
But it’s nothing new. And really, it’ s not going to get you the results you’re looking for.
Body Language Secrets That 99% Of Men Don’t Know About.
For the most part (not always, but in most cases) those physical traits are created from a mental element.
There’s something about the way you see the world and interact with the world that’s creating those elements in the first place and until you resolve that, things are never going to change.
Your body language *IS* holding you back from having the amazing success with women that you’re looking for. But it’s because it’s communicating a deeper message.
A message about how you really feel behind all the layers of ‘game’ that you’ve managed to develop.
Learning body language tips to change your physical elements is like swimming up river.
You’re working, and working, and working and when you stop, you realise that you’re right back where you started from.
You can push and push and force yourself into a different shape, but because the underlying issue is still there, you’re just going to revert back as soon as you forget to not do it.
Standing with your arms crossed is a good example.
It’s pretty common knowledge that standing with your arms crossed is makes you look closed off.
But you aren’t born closed off, it’s something that you learn. You learn to shut yourself away and hide from the world and the crossed arms is just a manifestation of that.
You can learn to change the way you hang your arms, and it may even work for a while.
But you’re going to get yourself back into a position to hide yourself away and it’s going to come right back again.
And even if it doesn’t, the fear that you were expressing through your crossed arms is going to find another way to come out through your body language.
It’s a never ending battle when you’re just dealing with surface level symptoms. Why? Because you don’t get down to the core.
So, to help you deal with those body language issues for good, I’ve put together a little three step guide that is going to help you firstly find that core issue and then start resolving it for good.
Tip 1: Work out what message you’re actually sending.
This one’s going to involve dropping your ego and taking on some feedback that you might not want to hear.
Most of the time, it’s not pretty. Especially if the person giving it is quite switch on.
See if you can find someone, preferably a woman…
(women have more than two times the area of the brain dedicated to reading non-verbal communication than guys do)
…who’s willing to give you open and honest feedback. Try and find a few women who’re willing to do it.
It can be women in your life now, it might be women that you’ve just met, it might be work colleagues, whoever you can find who’s willing to give you open and honest feedback.
It might sting a bit.
I know it did for me, but it’s going to be worth it.
It’s only once you know what people are experiencing from you that you can start to work with it.
If you can find someone who’s really honest with you, there’s a little exercise you can try.
Sit down with them, legs crossed, facing them. Get close enough so that your legs are touching and stare into their left eye.
Stay there for 15 minutes. At the end of 15 minutes, ask her what he experience of you was.
She should be able to give you some pretty good feedback.
One thing to consider: regardless of the words you’re using, there’s a message you’re conveying through your body that overrides all the words you’re using.
It’s coming out behind everything you say and is coming over the top of it.
You could use any words and the message wouldn’t change. So where do you think you should be devoting your time learning ‘game’ to?
Tip 2: Find the core of that message.
The body doesn’t lie. It doesn’t hide anything.
Whatever comes from your sub communication is one of the most accurate and honest representations of where you’re really at.
You can pull your shoulders back, stand up taller, lean back, but given any amount of time, the message you’re sending out is going to remain the same, regardless.
So take the feedback you get on board and try and dig inside it.
A good way to dig is to try the ‘why?’ technique. It’s fast and easy to do. Sit down.Take out a pen, and ask yourself:
“What am I afraid of feeling? Why am I afraid of feeling that? What am I afraid of feeling/ Why am I afraid of feeling that?”
It’s a really powerful way to dig inside the reasons that you’re communicating the message that you are.
It’s only once you have that core issue that you can start to melt away those layers that are responsible for that message that you’re sending out.
Tip 3: Stop playing with the outer symptoms.
Cut to the core, resolve that core issue and watch all the outer symptoms, especially your body language change for good.
Once you’ve gone through this and actually started cutting through the layers that you’re using to hide behind, things really start to change.
“Hi” starts to become the most powerful opener you have.
The things you’ve gone through in your day start to become the only routines you need.
Building incredible connections with beautiful women doesn’t involve a series of steps or intricate rituals, it’s jut a way of life.
Why? Because the underlying message you’re sending out is that you’re coming from a powerful, free, expressive place that women actually desire to be part of.
Rather than you having to trying and convince them to be a part of it.
LoGun